Cue Electric Light Orchestra music in the background.
Sums it up in a word, but to elaborate, PONY mares. Explains so much, doesn't it?
Ponies are closer to the ground, and therefore closer to hell. Pony mares, well, you get the picture.
I have two pony mares. What does that say about me?
ThePone is going to get an attitude adjustment here shortly, and with a quickness.
That is all.